Pregnancy Options

You have three legal options to choose from. These either continue the pregnancy or end it. If you decide to continue your pregnancy, you may decide to either make an adoption plan or parent the child. If you decide to end your pregnancy, you can have an abortion.

Abortion is an option if you do not want to be pregnant. It is a safe and legal medical procedure. It is safest, easiest and least expensive when done in the early weeks of pregnancy. In Minnesota, both parents must be told if their daughter age 17 or under intends to have an abortion. To get an abortion without notifying parents, the girl must get permission from the juvenile court.

Abortion costs range between $400 to over $1000 depending on how far into your pregnancy you are. Financial assistance is available.

Adoption means ending your parental rights and giving them to another person or couple. If you don’t want to end your pregnancy but feel you aren’t ready to be a parent, this is an option for you. There are a variety of ways to set up the adoption process and a variety of adoption agencies in the Twin Cities area.

Adoption costs are covered by the adoptive family. In Minnesota, they are required to pay for all legal fees and counseling you need. You may also request that they pay for medical and other expenses.

Parenting means you accept and are responsible for all of the needs of your child. You focus most of your time, energy and resources on your child. It is an extremely difficult task for a young person but it can be done. Parenting can be a rewarding and fulfilling experience. There are many sources of support and assistance in the community to help you, but you are the primary resource for your child.

Parenting costs are substantial and ongoing. Babies need special items, and so do older kids & teens. Child care, housing, clothing, food, toys, school, health care, and transportation all add up.

Estimated Annual Costs of Raising a Child by a Single-Parent
Before-tax income: Less than $36,000 (Average=$15,100)

As the child ages, the amount of money spent per year increases.
For example, between the ages of 15 and 17 the average amount spent grows to $7,120.

If you were not planning to have a child, but are pregnant now, you have a lot to think about.
Chances are you’re having a lot of conflicting thoughts and feelings. Your plans for the future. Your parents. Your partner. Your friends. School. Money. Are you ready to be a mom? Can you do it? Do you really want to? How can you do it? Who will help you, now and in the future? How about abortion — could that be the answer for you? Could you place your child for adoption? What would be the best thing for your child? For you?….
Take a deep breath. Remember, you always have options. And you have the right to choose the option that is best for you.
It may be the hardest decision you’ve ever had to make. Or you may know right away what feels right for you to do. There are clinics and social service agencies that have information and counseling that can help you. In any case, it’s important to actively make the decision and not just let things happen.
The information and questions here are intended to help you think things through, to help you consider facts and responsibilities as well as feelings and desires. Use them however they are helpful. Write down your answers, or discuss them with your partner, your parents, or a counselor. But in the end, the decision is yours.

What are your future goals and plans? Finish high school? College? Career? Travel?
Have you ever had hopes and dreams for yourself? A vision of what you want your future to be? How does your pregnancy fit in with them?
Before you found out you that you are pregnant, what did you plan on doing next year? The year after that? In five years? Ten?
Have you thought before about whether you want to be a parent or not? About whether you want to marry or not? When did you see these things happening for in your life?
How do you feel about being pregnant now? How do you think you would feel about being pregnant in the future?
How mature do you feel? Enough to be solely responsible for the health and well-being of a child? Do you think you are ready to be a parent or will the arrival of the child force you to be ready?

How will pregnancy and parenting affect your living situation? Can you stay where you are or will you have to move?
Can you afford to support yourself and your child? If you plan to rely on help from others, how long can you depend on them for money? How dependable are they? How much will they give you?
How will you get to school, day care, work, medical appointments, shopping?
How much time and money will you have for socializing and hanging out with your friends?
How will you go about finding affordable daycare and/or baby-sitters?

Do you have a boyfriend? Did you get pregnant by him? Has your relationship changed since you got pregnant ? In what ways? Can you depend on him for emotional support?
Does he show concern for you? Does he show interest in planning for your pregnancy?
Can you depend on him for financial support? Is he reliable?
Will he help you during your pregnancy? Will he change his plans for school, sports, social life to help you and support you while you’re pregnant?
What kind of parent would he be? Can you trust him to be as involved as you in parenting? For how long?
Have you ever thought of him as a possible marriage partner?
What qualities, traits and abilities do you want a lifetime partner to have? Does he have them?

What is your relationship with your parents like? How much do you talk and share? How important to you are their feelings, their opinions, their beliefs?
How do they feel about your pregnancy? Could you go against their wishes? What would happen if you did?
If you want to live with them while you are pregnant or parenting, will they let you? For how long? What will they expect of you? What will the ground rules be?
Will they support you? Will they care for your baby? Will they allow you to make your own decisions or will they expect you to do what they suggest?

A parent may be shocked at first, but remember, he/she still loves you.

Are you doing what you really want or are you trying to please others?
Are you basing your decision on the hope that the baby will force the father to stay involved with you?
Do you expect this pregnancy to do something for you — to give you a future, to have someone to love you, to make you complete, to get you out of your parents’ house, to make you grown-up?
How will you handle a change of heart? What if you regret the decision you made? Do you know where to look for help with those feelings?